1. 1 month ago 

    After going out in Palm Springs, I realize that I have plenty of time to save up for a vacation home.

  2. 1 month ago 

    RT @DETAILS: We love wine but we can never remember what we drank the night before. Read more about our weekly app pick, @Corkz: http:// …

  3. 1 month ago 

    Hi twitter. Sorry I’ve been MIA. I just haven’t had anything interesting to share. Let’s try and remedy that.

  4. 2 months ago 

    Somebody is eating his feelings tonight! Sealing of which, anybody have a spare pint of ice cream?

  5. 2 months ago 

    & on that note, it’s time for bed. & by note, I mean empty glass. & by empty glass, I mean empty bottle…that I put a straw in.

  6. 2 months ago 

    RT @scottstenholm: Saw my Bears win big while on approach during my flight into Chicago from LA, thanks @VirginAmerica. Looking good BEARS!

  7. 2 months ago 

    RT @Gogo: Three years ago, @Gogo launched on @VirginAmerica. Celebrate with 30 minutes of complimentary @Gogo this weekend! #hooray!

  8. 2 months ago 

    Amen. RT @ericjunior: Be careful what you ask for, and be ready when it’s handed to you!

  9. 2 months ago 

    Is it wrong that I’ll follow people on Twitter just because they have an attractive profile picture?

  10. 2 months ago 

    2 Weeks Left: Time to Start Packing!

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The Life and Times of a
Future Trophy Husband

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